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  • Writer's picture Brian E Pearson

About the Shoes

I have a tip for party-goers at this time of year. For the men especially and for those who live outside Ontario, or anywhere outside England for that matter. It's not a big deal, but it will be telling if you don't heed my advice. People will talk. So, are you ready? Here it is. Wear galoshes. Okay, it's not deep. But it may just save your social standing.

Here's the thing I have not understood since moving West, which was over twenty years ago now. You buy yourself a nice sports jacket, maybe a suit. You carefully choose a shirt and tie you think is going to say something about you, like that you are one dapper guy. Then you get the shoes. Shoes are important. They anchor the look. They make you stand straight and tall, like you know your business. Women have told me they will judge a man by his shoes, because he'll likely treat his woman like he treats his shoes. A word to the wise right there!

And then! Then you go to a house party, ring the doorbell, deliver your host or hostess a gift, stoop down and ... take off your shoes! I've had to stop right there and go get myself a drink. You will remove the sartorial feature that completes the ensemble and shows the world what kind of man you are. You will circulate among the partiers ... in your socks.

Now what gives with that?! Are you, like, eight years old? Do you think it's your socks that complete your look, as you pad around like you're in the ballet? There's a time and place for everything, including walking around the house in your socks. But a party isn't one of them.

So do yourself and the rest of us a big favour. Get yourself a nice pair of galoshes--rubber overshoes, if you didn't know. They come as toe rubbers (don't laugh), as mid-rise overshoes, and as full coverage waterproof boots. They also now come in an attractive range of decorator colours, including yellow and pink, so you'll be able to pick yours from all the others at the door. You're a real man. You can handle pink.

Then, you ring the doorbell, deliver your gift, remove your overshoes, and walk in like a man. In your shoes. There, I've said it.

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