Yesterday Jean and I celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary. We sat together in a nice restaurant and talked about what "amazed" us about each other. Oddly, they were the same things!
What amazes me about Jean is her utter commitment to whatever she is doing. She does nothing in half measures, including things around the house, like gardening and cleaning, for which half measures would be more than enough for me. But this is reflected in her work life, her recreational life, her volunteer life, in everything she does. "If something's worth doing ..." the saying goes.
What amazes her about me is my single-minded focus on the projects I take on, like this memoir I've been writing. No sooner was I out the door of my ministry at St. Stephen's, I started writing, six or seven hours a day, to account for my thirty-eight years as an ordained minister. It seemed worth doing.
Neither of us gets rejuvenated by sitting around, though there are times when we both need to crash, watching mindless TV, eating popcorn. But then, it's up again and on to the next thing. And it doesn't feel like compulsion, exactly. We're just happier when we're busy, when there are things to do, people to see, and miles to go before we sleep.
Marriage is a wonderful thing. Some marriages work because the two people are polar opposites, one filling in where the other fails, one stepping back where the other steps up. We're like that too, in some areas of our life. Jean's practical; I'm idealistic. She hears (and remembers!) song lyrics; I hear song arrangements.
But Jean and I are amazed by what actually feels familiar in the other, not what's different. It's sort of like loving something about ourselves, too, as we love each other, like a twofer. However it all works, I'm just happy that we seem to have figured something out about love. And because we're happy, maybe the world is a little happier too. Happy Love ... to us all!